We will be adding more critiques to this list over the next couple days, if you submitted a spot, your track will be displayed here by the end of the weekend. Thanks The 30 30
Kenneth Gladden
Thanks for your submission!
Here is your bullet point critique:
*You establish I nice soothing calming mood up front with the strings.
*We were looking for your piece to grow and build and take us through different stages, but we didn't hear a moment where the emotions changed.
*We heard the cymbal crash at 22 seconds in representing your explosive moment, however not only does the explosive moment need more than the cymbal crash, it needs more movement as well as some repetitive motiff that grabs the listeners attention.
*Try concentrating on your build the next time more as well. Every four measures or so we should hear new elements enter the picture. We feel as though your piece stays too mellow for too long and doesn't take off in the manner that makes it exciting.
*Rhythmically we also felt you could add more drums to your track to give it momentum and intensity. Try experimenting more with percussion and string movement to build your music to its crescendo moment.
Thanks
The 30 30
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Tracy Chapman
Thanks for your submission.
Here is your bullet point critique:
*Nice intro motiff.
*We feel your track would be much stronger with the proper instrumentation. We know that using synthesizers on keyboards can be tough when trying to create a convincing orchestral sounds, but there are ways to mask the synthetic nature.
*Try stacking your sounds with multiple layers to fill out the body of your strings. Lower octaves combine with higher octaves fill out your sound and may help your overall ensemble sound less synthy.
*We feel as though the trumpet that comes in at 18 seconds should grow with the rest of the piece. Instead of it fading out, why not create a build and have the trumpets become layered in different octaves and overtake the motif that is going on in the strings.
* The section at 23 seconds in we feel is too flat and not appealing enough to have a true purpose in the spot. It gives the listener a false resolve that lingers for too long and without a picture to validate this section, it seems to detract from the appeal of your track.
*We were also looking for your track to hit an mark of excitement and explosiveness. The trumpet makes the music somewhat regal but does build the intensity of the track.
*Next time try adding a higher octave to the strings at the point the horn comes in, and really get your percussion and drums moving more to create the proper momentum in the track.
*The percussion seem to feel a bit awkward at times. Try to tighten up your percussion and give us more surprises in your track. We want to feel pleasantly surprised and motivated to hear your track again and again.
Nice job.
Thanks
The 30 30 Team
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Benny Stoudemire
Thanks for your submission.
Here is your bullet point critique:
*Very nice job Benny.
*We love the movement in your strings and the surrounding harmonies that provide a richness and fullness to your track. Nice job.
*Very nice build and use of the pizzacato.
*Your layering of subtle sounds and intensifying string rhythms works very well in your track. You convey a sense of importance and urgency in a very elegant and alert way.
*Great job.
*Nice change up at the 18 second mark, we were hoping that the second time around at the 21 second mark you could add another layer that elevates and differentiates itself just a tad so that the drop down to piano would be even more dramatic.
Great job! Let's se what the client says.
Thanks
The 30 30 Team
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Teddy T Kebede
Thanks for your submission.
Here is your bullet point critique:
*Nice intro to your track Teddy. Try working on choosing sounds that don't sound to synthetic. Clients always have a problem with synthetic sounds, even though they are usually not willing to have a true orchestra play your music.
*Nice piano layering underneath your string motifs.
*Your piece has a somewhat international sound which is great. it almost sounds Asian. We like that aspect.
*Your piece is 47 seconds long which means that you need to cut out 17 seconds. We noticed that it felt long. Maybe you start it at 6 seconds in and also delete from 13 to 26 seconds in. This way you keep your most important sections like the build and the explosive section.
Your motiffs in this track are good, the main thing your track suffers from is the synthetic sound. You can avoid some of this problem by layering different octaves in your strings and choosing better sounds. There are all sorts of string software to purchase out there. We recommend getting it at some point.
*Very good job.
Thanks
The 30 30 Team
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BLACKGUYVER
Thanks for your submission.
Here is your bullet point critique:
*Nice opening motif. We like how you caught us of guard with your style. It intrigued us from the star. Great kick in at 10 seconds and build at 18 seconds.
*However, at 24 seconds, we realized you pulled back from the track and dropped it down when we were looking for you to take it even further so that we achieve that explosive moment. Seems like you could have started that next stage of explosiveness at 20 seconds and really ramp it up to it's resolving note at 27 or 28 seconds.
* You left us wanting more which is a good thing to a degree, but you didn't give it to us and in 30 seconds we have to want more and receive it withnin that time frame.
*Very nice execution and idea. Don't be afraid to take it to the next level.
*Let's see what they say.
Thanks The 30 30 Team
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PAY DEWS
Thanks for your submission.
*Nice job Pay dews. Very nice arrangement of sounds. We like the easiness of your track and also the visual landscape of your track.
*Very nice use of congo percussion. Yo create a nice intriguing focus up front and come in with percussion that makes an impact.
*we would have like to see you ramp it up even more at the 25 second point instead of bring it down. Maybe start building that moment more between the 18 to 24 second section. We need a bigger moment at the 25 second part and then sweep down to the innocence of the woodwinds.
*Great job. We are impressed with your musical range.
*Let's see what they say.
Thanks
The 30 30 Team
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Charles Singletary
Thanks for your submission.
Here is your bullet point critique:
Ouch:
Nice music! We think it's great on its own. It doesn't fit the orchestral music brief we were looking for on this ad, but musically it's tight. Are there illegal samples in this track? Be careful if so.
Commercial 1
*On this track, the music is way too long. This is a 30 second commercial. Try to do more things in the music as opposed to sitting on one or two chords for so long. Nice cerebral execution here, but we need your track to build to an explosive moment.
*This track is a bit too subdued for the music brief.
Game Over
*Be careful of using vocal samples on your tracks that are not copyrighted. Sounded like Kanye, but if it wasn't, then ignore the aforementioned.
*This track is cool but a little too reptitve in nature. We need your track to build and grow to an explosive hault. We really like the "Ouch" Track for something down the road. Let us know if you have samples in it.
Thanks
The 30 30 team
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Mike Chan
Thanks for your submission.
Here is your bullet point critique:
*Nice job Mike on your first orchestral piece.
*Nice voices. Where did you get them. Tell us about the creation of your track. It's very intriguing.
In terms of this brief, the music you have hear is a bit too dark and daunting for this spot. Nice use of space and instrumentation however, you are not far off especially considering that this is your first orchestral piece.
*Nice build. try to keep your percussion building as your other instruments buils.
*The voices demand much grander percussion to support your overall piece.
*Very nice structure and we like how you resolve your track.
*What kind of equipment did you use?
Thanks
The 30 30 team
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Gustavo Naranjo
Thanks for your submission.
Here is your bullet point critique:
*Nice overall mood.
*Your piece however stays at the same level from beginning to end. We were looking for your track to grow and build dynamically to an explosive halt.
*Your track was very even throughout and relaxed in a very appealing way but unfortunately, the music brief was asking for more out of the music.
*Try rhythmic strings and stronger more driving percussion to get the right lift and progression and excitement in your track.
*Nice calming, cerebral vibe however. Break out the incense!!!!!
Thanks
The 30 30 team
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Irv Johnson
Thanks for your submission.
Here is your bullet point critique:
*Nice intriguing opening, almost daunting and foreboding in nature. We were on pins and needles.
*You set us up nicely with your piano woodwind and string layers, but we were looking for you to bring in the thunderous timpany at 21 seconds so that your track ramped up to that explosive point. Musically your instrumentation grew in intensity, but the percussion needed to take us there as well.
*let's see what the client says.
*We think your track is a little dark in execution, however there is a daring, challenging, rich authenticity about it as well that may be unexpected and catch the client off guard in a positive way.
*Nice job! We are eager to see if the client takes to this track.
Thanks
The 30 30 team
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Brian S Tarr
Thanks for your submission.
Here is your bullet point critique:
*Nice intro.
*Nice intro of string rhythms at 15 seconds in and the takeover of higher octave strings at 20 seconds.
*Overall, we think your track has issues with harmony that make your strings sound a bit cluttered in the first 15 seconds. Try spreading out your harmonies more and using a combination of octaves that gives a feeling of openness.
*When your track kicks in at 15 seconds, we feel as though there should be a copmpelling melody or motiff there that drives it to an explosive ending. The repetitive strings that come in at 15 seconds lead us but seem to take up crucial time as if they are trying to find there way to a melody.
*Introduce your compelling theme at 15 seconds and rife it out to 25 seconds with a growing intensity and then break down to something small.
*Try to end your spot with a boom or stronger feeling of completeness next time as well.
*Nice job overall. The more you listen to ther music in this vibe, the more natural it will come to you. Study harmonies in music and spread out your octaves.
Thanks
The 30 30 team
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TIM BIAS
Thanks for your submission.
Here is your bullet point critique:
*Nice execution on your track, however we feel that the music here is more of a spectacle piece, almost capturing the majestic feel of a circus or magic act.
*The car ad music brief asked for elegance and power and explosiveness.
*Try watching some of the car ads on www.volitionsound.com for elegance and power.
*Hold it and save it for future spots. Nice execution.
Thanks
The 30 30 Team
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JUSTIN BARNETT
Thanks for your submission.
Here is your bullet point critique:
*Nice intro and set up.
*We like the way your strings enter and push the track forward.
*We were looking for that big impact and punch to come but your track fades out just when the opportunity takes us there.
*If you start your climb sooner and bring us to an explosive driving moment at around 20 seconds, then your track would be effective.
*We never got to that moment in your track though.
Nice build and nice set up however. Next time don't be afraid to let loose and give us the thunder!!
Thanks
The 30 30 Team
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WILLIAM DEAN
Thanks for your submission.
Here is your bullet point critique:
car comm. 3
*Your piece seems very avant garde. It's a bit disconnected and disjointed, however very interesting as a score.
*We don't feel like it fits the brief. We needed something both elegant and powerful that drove us to an explosive moment.
*We also felt the track was a bit dark and mysterious in mood. Probably too dark for this spot.
*Nice execution overall. We think this could be used for another spot. Be careful with the overly synthesized sounds. We like your use of space and time.
Car comm 2
*This track seems a bit too sedated and incomplete for this site. Try creating a driving motiff that builds and swells into an explosive moment. Check www.volitionsound.com for examples. Audi, Jaguar, etc...
Thanks
The 30 30 team
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IIG Productions
Thanks for your submission.
*Nice interesting layering in your track.
*Around the fifteen second mark, the odd harmonies that come in actually create a cool discomfort that really pushes the track forward with suspense.
*Very interesting IIG productions. We like your constant build. We would like to have heard the drums and percussion in the track really take off. Where would the track have gone if you extended it to 60 seconds. Whatever the answer to that question is, should be included musically in the 30 second version.
*The fact that the track doesn't quite take off is what holds it back.
*Nice job however.
*Any samples in this track? Let us know about your process.
*Let's see what the client says.
Thanks
The 30 30 team
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John Seymour
Thanks for your submission.
Here is your bullet point critique:
AD #1
*Nice set up. beautiful piano and supporting percussion as well.
*Sounds like your track is built for a sixty second commercial given the amount of time you give to the same motifs.
*For 30 seconds, I would cut from the 5 second to the 18 second mark out since it's mostly repetition.
*At that point it would be up to you as to where your track builds too. There needs to be a moment created in your track where a bigger melody and overall degree of euphoria that takes over and becomes the memorable portion of your music.
Nice piece of music, we just think it can go the next level and really give us something worth waiting for.
*Nice elegance and strength in your track! But we need a payoff.
Ad #2
*Nice opening once more. Very good build up of intrigue, but similar to the first submission, the track never really gives us the big payoff.
*Great execution and overall musicianship. Love the elegance, but the track needs to build towards something bigger as a reveal.
*Nice job! We would love to see you complete these tracks soon. We feel they have a high sell-ability quality if they are finished.
Thanks
The 30 30 Team
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Portlife
Thanks for your submission.
Here is your bullet point critique.
*Nice use of sound effects, but very risky considering that the brief did not describe a storm outside.
*We like the mystery surrounding the intro of your track but were looking for your track to take off once the stuttering kick drums came in at 18 seconds.
*From 21 seconds on, your track should take off into the stratosphere and give us a payoff of some sort.
*The idea started off nice, but we needed it to reach an explosive powerful elegance that had a memorable melodic line of some sort to it.
*Next time create a melody or motif that we can grab on to and push the track forward with percussion that moves and builds to a climax.
*Nice stutter drum but give us more.
*Watch out for the droning synth pad that seems to persist in your track. It may be what's holding it back.
Thanks
the 30 30 team
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Jamal Sandersen
Thanks for your submission.
Here is your bullet point critique:
*Interesting choice of keys.
*Try to saty away from cliche drum rolls Jamal in the beginning of your spot. They tend to signify game show themes or music that is outdated.
*The biggest issue with your piece is the synthetic sound of your instruments. Try layering different octaves into your string sounds so that they sound fuller. Also, the same goes for your horn sounds.
*Did you know your spot was 37 or 38 seconds long.
You can cut out portions of your music to make it fit thirty seconds.
*For future use, cut your intro to five seconds and try to build in five to six second increments. Your piece should build in a more compelling way. We think the melody of the French Horn in your piece sweeps over too long a period of time and doesn't get to the heart of what the track needs and that is a musical motif with explosive elegance.
*Nice effort. we like some of the harmonies in your piece. Watch out for some areas where the harmonies clash around 9 seconds and fifteen seconds and 21 seconds.
*Keep learning and building. Check www.volitionsound.com for car commercials.
*Nice vibe
Thanks
The 30 30 team
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Pete Tufel
Thanks for your submission.
Here is your bullet point critique:
Track 1
*Nice musicianship pete.
*We like your piece of music a lot. The mystery and imagination you create upfront is cool.
*For this assignment, we were looking for your spot to build to an explosive climax.
*Your track seems to even out at the 20 second mark when actually your spot should ramp up in excitement and rhythmic intensity.
*It's a very interesting approach however, and we like your orchestration style.
*We like your use of instrumentation. We think however, that the drums of your track could do a lot to lift up your piece. We were also looking for a repetitive string motif that would take over the spot and push it toward its climax.
*Nice overall execution Pete!!! Let's see what the clients say.
Track 2
*This track ends probably where it should start.
*The low bass strings that you introduce in the beginning get dark at the 11 second mark and just when it seems like it's going to lift off, the track breaks down to the arpeggiated harp sound.
*We were looking for a stronger motif took take over and elevate your music.
*Be careful with synth orchestral sounds that sound too synthy without the proper layering.
Thanks
The 30 30 team
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Aldo Martinez
Thanks for your submission.
Here is your bullet point critique:
*Nice opening, But your intro goes on too long. Your track should start building way before hand. Your music starts primarily at 25 seconds. You should cut some of your interesting early sections in half, and bring the music that comes in at 25 seconds a lot earlier.
*We like where your track goes but think it ends just when begins to take off.
*we are impressed with your orchestral acumen however.
*Some arrangement changes and your piece will be well on its way.
Thanks
The 30 30 Team
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Chris Vibberts
Thanks for your submission.
Here is your bullet point critique:
*Be careful of waltz music and car commercial. It tends to be too sentimental and complacent.
*For this car commercial, we needed something tht sparked intrigue from the beginning, with a touch of elegance, class and sophistication in a new and exciting way.
*Your piece seems great for another type of commercial since the actual execution of this style is great.
*But for the car commercial spot that will be shot, cool slick, modern, powerful music was what the client was looking for.
*Nice track however. Keep it on the shelf for future assignments where it fits.
Thanks
The 30 30 team
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SIRGE SOUND
Thanks for your submission.
Here is your bullet point critique:
*Interesting track.
*We think it could work for a different type of spot.
*For this commercial, the music sounds too technological.
*We would have liked to hear you use more natural, traditional orchestration with some surprises.
*What was your motivation with this track since it sounded so unique?
*Try starting out with just one instrument and building more instruments around it as it progresses.
*We also need a more obvious compelling melody that drives the track home.
*Check out www.volitionsound.com for some orchestral car commercials.
Thanks
The 30 30 team
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True Distinction
Thanks for your submission.
Here is your bullet point critique:
*Nice execution in your music.
*We like the straddling piano intro and the width of your musical landscape.
*Emotionally it feels a bit haunting at around the fifteen second mark.
*Be careful when creating emotions, they can easily be misinterpreted.
*Your track starts off with elegance and style, but turns disturbingly dark at the fifteen second mark which would be encouraging if the spot were intended to be melodramatic.
*Very good execution. Check your distortion levels at the twenty second mark where the spot gets big.
*This can definitely be used for another spot down the line. Nice musicianship and execution. we'd like to hear about your process. What software did you use, etc...
Thanks
The 30 30 team
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*Chris Chin
Thanks for your submission.
Here is your bullet point critique:
*Nice set up and intro. It probably should take half the time it does to set up your track.
*If you start your track at nine seconds that gives you nine more seconds at the end to establish a driving motivational theme for when the car starts driving.
*Nice instrumenttion
*we like the section of building at the 20 second mark. Very nice! Try ending with a bigger crescendo so that your drop off for the last two seconds or so is more dramatic. Even a strong timpany roll to punctuate the ending would work well.
*Nice job. Let's see what the client says
Thanks
The 30 30 team
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Shawn J. Period
Thanks for your submission
Here is your bullet point critique:
*Nice instrumentation and intriguing opening.
*We like the surrounding drama that you builds.
* We would have like to have heard an under current of drums that kicked the track off at the 15 second mark or so and drove the spot with a melodic motif to its climax.
*We love the regal rich sounds you use in your track
*Nice string trail off at the end.
*Nice recapitulation of your pizzacata theme at the end.
* Let's see what the client thinks.
Thanks
The 30 30 Team
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Philippe Bonhomme
Thanks for your submission
Here is your bullet point critique:
*Nice intro and build Phillipe.
* You led us to the water but didn't let us drink any. :)
*Your piece does everything nicely but then ends without really getting to the meat and potatoes of the music. Much like a cliffhanger.
*You need a section where all of the music is hitting on all cylinders. Drums percussion strings bass horns.
*Nice arrangement of strings, we definitely feel the class and sophistication and the impact of a car we are in awe of. You made the car feel special and unique, you just need to bring it home with your beginning theme which also means shortening other sections in your track.
*Very good job! We are impressed. You should take time to complete this track and resubmit it to us. It has potential.
Thanks
The 30 30 Team
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MIKE PORTER
Thanks for your submission
Here is your bullet point critique:
*Nice vibe.
*The synthesizer sounds automatically put your track in a category you don't want to be in. Try using sounds that are layered in octaves. Sometimes string sounds can feel fake when they are not layered. However, your ideas are good.
*We like the suspense that you create in your track and the build that follows.
*We would love to hear your track recorded with nicer sounding instrumentation. *Look up software places like soundsonline. They have different software for the orchestra.
*YOUR IDEAS ARE VERY NICE.
Thanks
The 30 30 Team
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BLAKE SKIPPER
Thanks for your submission
Here is your bullet point critique:
*Your track is very cerebral and almost futuristic like. We like the vibe on its own.
*We think it could benefit from adding a sense of mystery and anticipation upfront.
*We also believe that your track could be helped immensely by stronger more driving melodies and percussion.
*The soft and subtle nature of your track actually holds it back from the music brief we issued. We need an area where your track builds and builds into an explosive moment that really pushes the envelope.
*Try a more aggressive approach next time with traditional orchestral instrumentation.
*Your track is cool for technological spots I can hear. Keep it cause it's nicely executed for many other products and music briefs.
*Nice track.
Thanks
The 30 30 Team
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JUSTIN BARNETT
Thanks for your submission
Here is your bullet point critique:
*Did you send two tracks because that is what it seems like.
*This track has a lot more energy then the first track we critiqued.
*Nice intro and build but we would have like to see your track end with the theme you began with. Without this tie in your track feels incomplete to us.
*Good vibe.
*We would like to feel a more regal, rich, sophisticated theme in your track that builds into an explosive moment that is motivationg and exciting. Try to reach that point with your track the next time. Your track is headed in the right direction.
Thanks
The 30 30Team
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THE PSYCLONES
Thanks for your submission
Here is your bullet point critique:
*Nice intro piano and anticipatory build in the first 15 seconds.
* Be careful with the string sounds you use. We think we hear a bad note around the 12 second mark in your track.
*Definitely clean that area up.
*Make sure that when using string that you build your string lines in layers with different octaves.
*Nice strong theme that comes in briefly around 17 seconds with the percussion. This is the go to moment in your track. Make sure that you take full advantage of that moment next time and push that part to a rising climax where all your instruments explode and release.
*Nice idea. The synthesized instrumentation in your track holds your piece back from being purchased. Clients want to hear as close to a real orchestra as possible.
*Nice ideas!
Thanks
The 30 30 team
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DIONNE PEETE
Thanks for your submission
Here is your bullet point critique:
*Your intro seems to work well with the piano, but after that it seems as though the level volume of your track goes down and we lose sight of where you're going with your track.
*Then, your piece picks back up which is good but the five seconds that precede it do not provide the right progression in your track. It takes away the momentum of your music.
*We would like to hear more build and excitement in your track.
*Your instrumentation is also a little suspect due to the synthetic sound of the strings.
*Make sure your sounds feel authentic and convincing enough for the ideas that you play.
*Try also to establish a stronger string theme in the beginning of your piece that is impactful, and emotional and elegant and powerful all in one.
*You will be amazed at your results if you get the sound of your instrumentation correct. You have nice ideas, they just need to be executed stronger.
*Keep practicing, the ideas are always the most important, the rest is all a matter of practice. You're halfway there.
Thanks
The 30 30 team
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Tony Donelson
Thanks for your submission
Here is your bullet point critique:
Track 1
*Nice abstract intro, pretty interesting, but probably too jazzy for this music brief. *The track doesn't seem to follow the idea of the music brief.
*The musicianship is great for jazz, but your track needs to build and establish a theme that expands and explodes into a feeling of elegance and power.
Track 2
*Your track sounds a little too dangerous for this brief.
*We need style class elegance and power. The musicianship sounds nice and the execution is great for another spot. One with suspense and danger and heroism around the corner. Overall though it sounds a bit canned. Even for danger there needs to be more heart and soul in it to really take it to that apex.
Track 3
*Your use of horns is very interesting Tony.
*we would have liked to hear you mix your instrumentation up a bit with strings and piano and percussion that moves and motivates and builds with anticipation.
*Try starting with a subtle piano or string and then build the horns in around the solid string motif. This would put you structurally in he position to give us the mystery and anticipation and sense of sophistication and elegance that the track needs.
*The oneness of horn sounds here in your track makes your idea sound cluttered and a bit mushy. You want to spread your sounds out and add texture and movement. Check www.volitionsound.com for orchestral car commercials.
*Take this into consideration on your next assignment and you'll see improvement quickly.
Thanks
The 30 30 team
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Bill Kace
Thanks for your submission.
Here is your bullet point critique:
*Nice set up Bill. Very nice piano elegantly done.
*We feel as though your track needs to build much quicker in 30 seconds.
*When the energetic section pops in it seems a bit disconnected to the beginning of your piece.
*We also think that the energetic section sounds a lot like a news anchor segment on television.
*Try a more current and modern approach that elevates and motivates the importance of the car. stings mixed with electronica or big beat orchestral percussion can add to your track.
*Check volitionsound.com for some car commercials.
*For this assignment, we need a more modern, and current approach that takes new risks and gives us some pretty unpredictable surprises.
Thanks
The 30 30 team
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ERIC ANDERSON-AFROKEYS
Thanks for your submission
Here is your bullet point critique:
*Wow! Nice overall vibe for your track. You have a great acumen for orchestral. we remember the piece of music you gave us at the dynamic ERIC producer conference. Glad to hear from you again.
*For this assignment you have great ideas. we would have liked to see you start out more sparse, maybe just the high strings alone and gradually bring in the lower strings.
*Nice adventure you take us on. we like the anticipatory build.
*Nice key change. we would have liked to see you arrange your track so that it starts small and gets big. It gives us more to look forward to.
*Make these changes in your track and resubmit it to us. we think your track has a lot of potential sell-ability.
Thanks
The 30 30 Team
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DELPHI PRODUCTIONS
Thanks for your submission
Here s your bullet point critique:
*Nice track Delphi.
*We really like your convincing instrumentation and compelling rhythms.
*We like how you brought the track down to subtle piano at the end.
*Try starting off your track small and gradually making it big and bigger and the reach a climax and then come back to your piano. This would make for a more anticipatory climax.
*Very nice execution. Please tell us your process and the equipment you used. Any samples? Licensed or unlicensed?
*Nice job. By the way, how did you get your logo on your mp3 file? HOT!!!!
Thanks
The 30 30 Team
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JEFF SAMPLE
*Nice intro, but we feel that it's a bit too long, by the time your next segment begins fifteen seconds have gone by. Try to shorten your intro.
*When the music goes down at fifteen that is a nice surprise but then it should come back with all the ingredients of your track.
*We never really get a chance to feel any driving momentum in your track.
*For next time, try to make sure that you include a main theme section that has an over-riding driving rhythm pushing it forward.
*we feel like this track never really takes off with the strength and elegance that it needs.
*At 20 seconds, your tempo should be high and moving toward its climax.
*A faster tempo and a more defined theme would help your track immensely.
Thanks
The 30 30
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MARK BERMAN
Thanks for your submission.
Here is your bullet point critique:
Smooth RIde
*This track is very traditional in spirit. Movie score like. Probably too traditional and wholesome for this spot.
*It is somewhat similar to the beginning and end of your other track Auto Moto.
*Try to listen to more current instrumentation and motifs in your writing styles.
Auto Moto
*Wow you have quite a few surprises in your track.
*We think your intro and set up may be too long for a 30 second commercial. Your set up goes until 16 seconds. In the interest of time try to cut it down to 6 or 7 seconds.
*Also, we think that your intro is very well executed but maybe too disney-esque. We think you are creating the wrong mood in the beginning. Right now it's very traditional almost vintage twentieth century fox style composing. Nice in execution but probably the wrong mood for this spot.
*At 20 seconds when we hear the radical change, we are surprised that you didn't keep any connection to the original section accept for the lingering string.
*We think your track sounds a little too disjointed.
*Also try more modern scoring and production, we don't want you to lose because your production sounds dated.
*Try not to wrap up your music too cliche like. Advertisers want to always be on the cutting edge of sound and technology. Make sure your track is right up there on the edge!
Thanks
The 30 30 Team
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TYLER STEELE
Thanks for your submission.
Here is your bullet point critique:
*Nice introduction to your track, but we feel it is a bit too dark and foreboding like we are preparing for battle.
At 25 seconds we start to feel innovative like we are witnessing something great, a spectacle of some sort, but just when it gets interesting the track ends five seconds later.
*(what do you do about this) You make your intro much shorter and jump to the meat and potatoes after the first four measure stanza.
*Then bring in percussion that accelerates the track and picks it up a notch.
*Overall we like the track but probably for a different more ominous style project.
*This track is a bit too battle oriented and lacks the elegance and class that we are looking for. Try to create more regal, rich, and sophisticated emotions in your music with a blast of power and class wrapped in one.
*Nice job.
Thanks
The 30 30 Team
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Johnathan Cobert
Thanks for your submission
Here is your bullet point critique:
*Nice structure and arrangement Johnathan.
*Nice mystery upfront, and nice build up.
*Try to make sure that when playing synthesizer strings really fast, they tend to sound very fake.
*Counter this by doubling the high strings with mid and low octave strings on accompaniments that play the same part and fatten up the sound.
*The spots we noticed were at 10 seconds and at 19 seconds.
*We like the way that you recapitulated the theme at the end in the higher range.
*Very nice.
*Nice drum programming, very nice quantizing. Neatly done.
* There seems to be a bit of humor and sarcasm in this track. Almost like a parody. This is not necessarily a bad thing. Almost like a dog scampering through a yard and chasing a mailman around the block. It's very picturesque!!! Nice job.
*We'd like to hear you take a few more risks with instrumentation and theme.
*We think you did a good job but played it somewhat safe.
*This can work at times, but when you want to wow the client it may not be enough. For car commercials, we think the emotion should be chic almost untouchable with class elegance and sophistication. We'd like your opinion and feedback.
Nice JOB!
Let's see what they say!
Thanks
The 30 30 Team
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DAVID SUTHERLAND
Thanks for your submission
Here is your bullet point critique:
* Nice intro David. We love the simpleness of your piano but hoped that it would eventually build into something more thunderous and compelling.
*At 19 seconds maybe a giant timpani roll and a percussive thrust with powerful drumming to accompany your triplet piano playing at that point.
*We think your track has great potential if you fleshed out the area that starts at 19 seconds and added more instrumentation that built up and raced to a climax. We like the way your track concludes.
*Your track needs more propulsion and excitement by the 19 second point. In its present form the track stays too cerebral. We like your ideas and the direction you were headed.
*Nice piano theme as well.
*Nice job.
Thanks
The 30 30 Team
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DIANE CHEADLE
THANKS FOR YOUR SUBMISSION
HERE IS YOUR BULLET POINT CRITIQUE:
*Wow Diane!! Very different. We love your style of composition.
*Very different, very unexpected!! We love the almost out of key arpeggiated synth violin you have pulsing throughout the beginning.
*The percussion that follows with the big hits is dated somewhat but in an exciting almost nostalgic, welcoming way. We wish there was more to your track because it is very visual.
*We would like to see you establish and build on a definite theme in your music. We hear the synth violin rhythm being overtaken by the bells in the percussive section which is cool but at some point we need that theme to be more prominent as something that carries the spot to the finish.
*It takes 10 seconds for your theme to turn around and that is a lot of time that can be used to build your track.
*Maybe try a shorter them next time. This will give you more time to have 3 to four sections in 30 seconds.
*Very unique sound. Nice job!
Let's see what the client says.
Thanks
The 30 30
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PLAYBOY CHI
Thanks for your submission.
Here is your bullet point critique:
*Very interesting intro Playboy Chi, but your track seems to never really get off the ground. Great textures and sonic tones!!!!!!!
*Love the introverted almost cerebral feeling of your track.
*Great sound design feel.
*We would love to hear you put a strong percussive rhythmic drum behind this at the 19 second mark.
*Wow! We are impressed with the abstract uniqueness of your track. Ver cool. Nice experimentation. You took risks and impressed us with your musical decision making.
*Very nice job. Add drums to this, even if it's a backbeat with hip hop undertones and send it back to us ASAP. It's very innovative and regal and new. We like it a lot. Way to push yourself. We'd love to hear your process on this.
*Nice job!
Thanks
The 30 30 Team
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DASHAWN
Thanks for your submission.
Here is your bullet point critique:
Master Mix 1
*Very mysterious Dashawn. Your intro seems to wander for too long a time, almost 19 seconds. As a separate piece, your musical execution sound s very convincing and beautiful.
*For this spot, we needed driving motivated elegant, calssy explosiveness in your track.
*we were looking for a moment when your track really took off and went to the next level thematically and rhythmically.
*Nice piece. Very cerebral and soothing.
*I like it for another commercial down the road.
*Nice use of violin towards the end to button up the piece. Nice piano playing.
*A definite keeper for future projects!!
Master Mix 2
*Nice intriguing intro and instrumentation.
*By the 14 second mark however the track seems to take a wrong turn into something dark and then by the 20 second mark the track switches complexions again but in a less sophisticated way.
*We would start from 24 seconds and try to re-build the piece to the end in a more compelling way.
*The intro up to 14 seconds i s very compelling.
* Don't forget to use percussion and orchestral drumming to take your track to the next level.
Thanks
The 30 30 team
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CARY POTTS
Thanks for your submission.
Here is your bullet point critique:
Quiet nights
*Your track is cool but probably to magical and toy soldier-ish for this car commercial which needs to be classy elegant explosive and powerful all at once.
*The snare drum roll in the back ground gives it an immediate military feel which categorizes your track to the client in the wrong way since there is no military personality to the car.
*Try establishing a more dominant theme upfront and sticking with it as it builds to a climax.
*Save this for another spot because it is executed pretty well.
Divine Order
*This track start off very intriguing and builds quite nicely.
*At the nineteen second mark we need your track to really kick into overdrive and stick with a strong theme at that point.
*Your track sound more like underscore as opposed to a piece with a beginning middle and end. It seems to wander around simply for the sake of wandering around.
*We like what it's doing but need a clearer path to 30 seconds then what we are hearing.
*Very nice instrumentation. Check volitionsound.com for strong examples of orchestral car commercials.
Thanks
The 30 30 team
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9TH ELELMENT
Thanks for your submission.
Here is your bullet point critique:
*Nice intriguing intro but the repetition of the pizzacato created a tense almost reticent vibe in your track and with the tempo change it became a bit frenetic like a mouse tip toeing or scurrying around.
*Try creating a more dominant theme upfront and build around that theme ina way that is royal, regal, sophisticated classy and powerful.
*Replacing the pizzicato with piano would probably help immensely.
*The droning chord later in the track seems to bring your track down when it probably should go to the next level at that point.
*We would eliminate the drone all together and find another way to build and resolve your track.
*Check volitionsound.com for orchestral commercials that sold to clients.
Thanks
The 30 30 team
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IMPACT
Thanks for your submission.
Here is your bullet point critique:
*Off the bat we think that your string sounds in the intro should be changed to sound more authentic. The synthesizer vibe stands out too much and works against your track. Sometimes you have bettersounds in your keyboard if you experiment with some of your patches.
*Your beginning motif leads into a more interesting string pattern that sounds more authentic. Try these type of string sounds in the beginning.
*we feel like your track ends just when it should be taking off to the next level. If you re-work this track in the future, try to create a third section in your track that accentuates a musical theme and drive it home with thunderous percussion .
*We also didn't hear much elegance and explosiveness in your track./
*Check www.volitionsound.com for commercials, Audi, and two Jaguar spots.
*We think your track would benefit from less synthy sounds and a more defined string melody.
Thanks
The 30 30 Team
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Leonard L
Thanks for your submission!
Here is your bullet point critique:
*Your track is pretty hot! You started out small and created an amazing rich textured classy build that reached a climax.
*And just when we thought it was done, you dropped the intensity for two seconds and then brought the intensity and explosive power right back in our face and ended in a way that made us want more.]
*Very professional.
*Nice work.
*Great theme and strong build.
Wow!
Thanks
The 30 30 Team
Kenneth Taylor
Thanks for your submission.
Here is your bullet point critique:
*Nice introduction to your track Kenneth, but we feel as though your track doesn't have a defined direction. Almost like it is searching for answers.
*Your track should feel elegant and stylish from the beginning and then constantly build from there.
*Then bring in percussion that accelerates the track and picks it up a notch.
*Your instruments sound very synthesized and that is holding your track back.
*We feel your track would be much stronger with the proper instrumentation. We know that using synthesizers on keyboards can be tough when trying to create a convincing orchestral sounds, but there are ways to mask the synthetic nature.
*Try stacking your sounds with multiple layers to fill out the body of your strings. Lower octaves combine with higher octaves fill out your sound and may help your overall ensemble sound less synthy.
*Try to create more regal, rich, and sophisticated emotions in your music with a blast of power and class wrapped in one.
*Also, try not to create tracks that are melancholy or solemn.
*The client for this ad wants to be wowed by excitement and surprise. Class elegance and explosiveness. We were waiting for your track to take off and it never seemed to.
*check volitionsound.com for orchestral car commercials that the client purchased.
Thanks
The 30 30 team
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HVNIC
Thanks for your submission.
Here is your bullet point critique:
*Interesting track.
*We think it could work for a different type of spot.
*For this commercial, the music needs to be more elegant and explosive.
*Also your percussion could be more dramatic and explosive at the halfway point when the chimes come in.
*we need your track to make a bigger statement from the beginning to the end.
*Try starting out with just one instrument and building more instruments around it as it progresses.
*We also need a more obvious compelling melody that drives the track home.
*There are some nice arrangement moments around the twenty second mark where the chimes come in but maybe you could embellish and exaggerate that moment more. We need a big statement to be made here.
*Check out www.volitionsound.com for some orchestral car commercials.
*You have a good idea that can be re-worked and embellished to be sold in the future.
Thanks
The 30 30 Team
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FUTURE MUSIC
Thanks for your submission
Here is your bullet point critique:
*Nice piano paying. Are these samples or is there a concert pianist among us.
*Very nice movement and build in your piece. We like how you establish a motif upfront and build upon it.
*Be careful of your violin synths sounding too thin.
*To offset this, try layering your violins in octaves where necessary.
*Nice hits towards the end. Applause is unnecessary but a fun touch.
Overall, we like your piece. Your structure and arrangement is very good.
*Nice job! Let us know about your piano playing. Samples, or live. Let us know asap because we have to know whether to send this track to the client. If they are samples, we cannot send them to the client.
Thanks
The 30 30 Team
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B Rob Productions
Thanks for your submission!
Here is your bullet point critique:
*Very nice classy opening intrigue and suspense.
*After the first ten seconds, we are expecting the trck to go to the next level with percussion maybe or a motivating bassline, but don't hear it.
*From 11 seconds to 20 seconds we hear mainly a repeat of the first ten seconds.
*So, by the time your track has a new level of movement and intrigue, you are already twenty percent in, which only leaves you 10 seconds to provide power and explosiveness and a resolve.
*Since you cose the 20 second mark to make everything happen, we expected hear you really wow us with the direction of the music, but instead the 20 second mark really acts more as a section that should come in at 10 seconds.
*This would leave you with a fresh new 10 seconds to create something exciting and powerful and explosive.
*Overall, your track is interesting and anticipatory but it leaves us feeling like it isn't finished. Almost like it was just getting started and ended before elevating to an infectious theme or motif.
*Try establishing a theme up front and building slowly on that theme to a climax and a resolve.
*Try looking at volitionsound.com for orchestral car commercials that build.
*Your intro is very cool. Nice job. The rest of the track can be re-worked to be strong and powerful and explosive. Try revising your track based on this advise and hold it for the next appropriate assignment.
Thanks
The 30 30 Team
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RASHAD
Thanks for your submission!
Here is your bullet point critique:
*Very nice job Rashad. Love the textures and attention to detail. Very professional sounding and elegant, sexy, captivating, classy and sophisticated.
*We are missing the moment however when your track really kicks up a notch and builds to an explosive climax.
*At 20 seconds, we thought your build and climax could start there as opposed to repeating the same section from earlier.
*Veery nice build, but you need to make a statement at 20 seconds. Imagine the car moving. How does it move. It's explosive yet sophisticated.
*You mastered the classy elegant regal rich sound. All we needed to hear at that point was the explosiveness.
*Great job!!
Thanks
The 30 30 Team
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Liquid Fusion
Thanks for your submission.
Here is your bullet point critique:
*We feel as though your sounds are too synthesized sounding. Horns are especially difficult to recreate unless you are using French Horns.
*Structurally, your track sounds more like an underscore for specific action as opposed to a track that builds gradually. The reason we feel this way is because you start and stop your musical ideas. The ideas from section to section seem a bit disjointed and hard to follow.
*Try creating a theme in the beginning with one instrument line and build and develop sounds around that line.
*The synth sounds make it difficult to hear elegance and class in your track, but the actual ideas also sound a bit 18th century jousting competition. Very Royal almost King like and sound.
*Try to back off of the pomp and circumstance of king queen culture and create a compelling classy, elegant , rich modern explosive track that makes us want to hear more.
*Try creating a seamless piece of music so we are not constantly searching for a pulse to hang onto in your track.
*Check www.volitionsound.com for orchestral car commercials: Audi, Jaguar, etc...
Thanks
The 30 30 Team
THE END
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1 comment:
Hi 30-30 Team.
Thanks for the Critique. I'll work on it for the next commercial.
Peace,
HVNIC
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